I could be furious with her and still love her. Accepting both truths at once was painful, but pretending one erased the other would only create another lie.
I also thought about my mother, the woman half of Millfield had remembered as generous and deeply moral. Ruth had convinced herself that controlling other people’s lives was justified because she believed she knew what was best for them.
Carol had eventually made the same mistake.
Perhaps she had begun by believing silence would protect me, Rebecca, or the life we had created together. Over the years, however, every additional day of silence made the truth more dangerous and confession more frightening.
Her final request had been the only way she found to break that cycle. She sent me to Anna because she knew that once I reached her, the secret could no longer survive.
I still did not know whether I had completely forgiven Carol. Forgiveness, I discovered, was not a single decision made in a hospital room or after reading a box of old letters.
